...a Christmas Eve Mass-adventure

it was a simple concept, write a post, go home & change...
come back and cantor for 2 Christmas Eve masses...

the continuing question of my throat health...
had me sucking on cough drops & drinking as much water as I could...
so when the post took longer than I thought it would...
I found myself still at the church at 4 PM[I had to start singing at 5...]

I went into the church to snag bulletins...
so I'd have the Gospel Acc. verse to cantor...
lit some candles, said some prayers and left...
only to bump into Fr Toolbelt as he arrived...

knowing that now I was really behind schedule [I HATE that...]
I hurried home[it's only 2 miles...]
ran inside ignoring the whining dog & meowing kitties...
went into my bedroom, let in the Piglet, changed clothes...
fed the kitties, gave Molly something to chew on and raced out the door...

back at the church, I realized that my stand light...
which I needed, was in my Ren. group bag, in my house...
with 5 minutes before "caroling" was to start, I went downstairs...
but couldn't find any of our clip-on lights...

I went back upstairs, placed my music stand, hymnal, carol list...
cough drops & water bottle in the center & began to lead the carols...
fortunately, there were several strong male voices at the 1st service...
so when my voice decided that "d" was too high and "middle c" was too low...
[which happened after the 2nd verse of "Joy to the World", the 2nd carol...]
they did OK when I had to drop out from time to time...

on the next to last carol["In the Bleak Midwinter"]...
as I was having to hold my hymnal up close because of bad light...
Fr Toolbelt, on his way to vest for Mass, turned on a "side spot"...
problem solved... I could see, now if only I could sing...

the caroling complete, we moved into the Mass itself...
there was an obnoxious intonation problem in certain stops on the organ...
which grated on all my nerves, but it couldn't be fixed during a service...
so I gritted my teeth and carried on... [it was really bad...]

I cantored the Gospel Acc.[we said the Psalm]
and led the singing for the Offertory hymms & 2 Communion hymns...
during the dismissal, which was,"Hark, the Herald Angels Sing" [more "d's"]
I suddenly remembered that I was supposed to tell the organist...
to go to a softer stop for verse 3, leading into the "Silent Night"...

I sidled over to the organ during verse 2...
and whispered, "go to a softer stop for verse 3"...
since you often need to repeat things for him...
I was astonished when he pressed a stop button before vs3...
and verse 3 ["mild He lays His glory by..."] began much more softly...

this quiet ending to the service, was why I didn't play trumpet this year...
we decided that it was just too much bravado...
and not the contemplative atmosphere Fr TB wanted to create...
there was no organ postlude either for the same reason...

then Fr Toolbelt played his guitar from the back of the church...
and led us in,"Silent Night" & when my voice quit because it was so low...
I "ooo-ed" an impromptu obbligato on the third verse
we were all thinking,"cool, just like that Christmas Eve when it was written"...
but we had NO idea then just how much closer...
to THAT Christmas Eve we'd get before it was over...

after discussing the organ's pitch issues, we decided to tune it later...
I got home before 7 & rested until 9:30 when I went back to the church...

I set-up my stand, with the light I'd remembered this time...
we tuned the stops on the "great" that had been so bad...
and then things began to spiral out of control...



Supersop, who is the consummate pro, couldn't find her music...
then I began to realize that with 1 sop, 2 alti, 2 tenors, 1 bass...
[& a partridge in a pear tree...]
that we really couldn't sing the anthem we'd planned to sing...
we had already moved the Clavanova down, but it wasn't in the way...

about this time, we discovered a few "discrepancies"in the bulletin...
Bassoprofundo asked,"why are the opening & closing hymns the same?"
we, the choir, were discussing whether or not to "bag" the printed anthem...
and go with a hymn, etc., etc., etc.

when suddenly, a loud sustained note from the organ took us by surprise...
the most surprised was the organist...
as he was 10 feet away from the console at the time...

it was a cypher...

a cypher on an organ is an involuntary sounding of a note or notes which may continue ad infinitum...

since it was just past time to start the caroling for the late service...
we went ahead, but on "Joy to the World", BC started screaming through the organ...
it was a very LOUD cypher and didn't stop...
so I cut off the singing, the organist moved over to the Clavanova...
and we carried on, using it all the way through the service...

I had put Supersop on alert...
and soon had to call her up to help me lead the carols...
the altar party was ready in the back of the church when we finished...
& I had happily remembered to announce the number of the opening hymn...

after the nice Christmas Proclamation, they moved to the Creche to bless it...
as they arrived[it was in front up on the raised area, on a table]
Fr Toolbelt turned and said something to me which I didn't get...
then he said it again, louder,"Go get Jesus !"
Father G pointed to the back corner of the church...
where I could see SquarePeg moving with stealthy quickness...

she picked-up something, turned and handed it to me...
it was the Baby Jesus for the manger...
feeling a bit like a mid-wife, I gimped back up the side aisle...
and handed Jesus to Fr TB, who placed Him in His manger...

then as we sang the correct opening carol,"O Come, All Ye Faithful"...
the altar party processed around the sanctuary...
[did I mention that there was incense ? not too much...
but at this point, any, was too much...

the altar was glorious with poinsettias and resplendent with greens...
all the candles were lit & the congregational attendance was respectable...

over in the choir pews however, I was changing stuff left & right...
the singers had decided that they weren't comfortable with the listed anthem...
so we replaced it with "Lo How a Rose"...
which was in the bulletin as our Communion piece...

we replaced "Lo", with the first Communion hymn from the early service...
"O Little Town" [Forest Green]
which had been left out of the late service...
because the choir would be there...

so without disturbing the worship service...
I had to make sure that every singer knew what we were doing...
then there was the organist, whose folder we had to "fix"...
all the while, keeping part of my brain focused on what was happening...

'cause I had to cantor, any time now, the Psalm and the Gospel Acc. verse...
which wasn't printed in the late bulletin...
[fortunately, I'd noticed this before the service...
and snagged an old early service bulletin out of the trash]

finally past my specific cantoring tasks...
I readied myself for the choir "anthem"...
one of the alti wasn't real familiar with the irregularities of the alto part...
on "Lo, How a Rose", so I gave her my hymnal, which is marked...
I used the L&C copy from my folder...

I also told Supersop, who had sang a lot to help me through the caroling...
that after verse 1, where I'd sing alto to show them how, if they'd forgotten...
[which as it turned out, was a very good idea on my part...]
I'd join her on soprano [not my favorite thing...]

things went fine for the anthem...

I decided to do verses 1,2,3,5 of "O Little Town..."[Forest Green]
for the Communion & it was a perfect fit...
we moved into "Hark"...
and the wimpy Clavanova didn't even need dialing down for verse 3...

as the final strains of "Silent Night" wafted off, I could hardly keep my eyes open...
all the singers were amazed at how ironic it was...
that we had planned the guitar/Silent Night...
and THEN, the organ went "on the fritz"...

we all had a good "irony" chuckle, wished each other a Merry Christmas...
I thanked the stalwart singers, inwardly laughing at BC for his efforts...
and just about jumped out of my skin when the organ suddenly screamed again...
hair on end, I looked to see the organist, shutting it off & saying...
"well, I guess it's still cyphering"... [he is a master of understatement]

After dropping off MZYBee, I went home...
crawling into bed well after midnight...
where I stayed all Christmas Day, mostly sleeping...
occasionally awakening to re-inflate my stupid bed...

far and away, the weirdest Christmas I've ever spent...

BC was there, but God was good, anyway...