...more "good things"

when I returned to Mudville in 1978 from Chicagoland...
among the service providers I had to find...
was someone to cut my hair...

I'd been spoiled in CL by becoming a client of a CL native...
who had made it "Big" in NYC & returned every 6 weeks to CL...
to spend a long weekend with family & friends...
and cut hair from dawn 'til well past dark...

it was hard to get "in" with Marilyn, you had to know someone...
otherwise you might wait forever to get a cancellation spot...
I got in & the woman, who was a genius with scissors...
would coax a stylish-looking head of hair...
out of my straight, no body, floppy mop...

in Mudville,1978, I accidentally stumbled upon Robin...
when I finally darkened the door of a long-time Mudville salon...
[Sir G's... which may now be defunct for all I know...]
she seemed to "get" me...and my hair...
didn't try to talk me into a bunch of froo-froo stuff...
and things were fine for a year or so...

then one day, she told me that she was leaving town...
and sending all her clients to another "girl" at another Sir G's...

Wendy hadn't been cutting hair too long [a year or so...]
but Robin liked her sense of style & thought that I'd do well with her...
and since now, 30 years later, I'm still going to her...
I guess Robin was right...

I've "followed" Wendy all over Mudville in those 30 years...
she's gotten divorced, re-married & had several kids...
her husband owns the Mudville Auto Center Car Wash...
and a few years ago, he built her a salon inside Carwash...
where there is also a gift shop, a café & even a shoeshine stand...

so yesterday, I went to get my hair cut at 4:30 PM...
and I was NOT looking forward to the conversation we needed to have...
my current financial state has left me needing to make cutbacks...
and nearly $40 every 5 weeks is more than I can justify for a haircut...

it had been 8 weeks since the last one...
[I had to cancel 2 weeks ago]
and I was looking pretty shaggy...

now, you might say that I should just find a cheaper haircut...
and I have to say that not everyone can successfully cut my hair...
and since I never know when a job opportunity might present itself...
I can't afford to look shaggy & unkempt...

so with a heavy heart, I asked about possibilities...
for a less-expensive cut...
perhaps just the cut, no shampoo or blow-dry...
there is already no styling involved...

it was a year or so ago, she told me that because of being a long-time client...
I was paying $5 less for my haircut than everyone else did anyway...

she said that my haircut really didn't use all the services...
that were included in her price, so she offered to drop my cost...
to $25 [almost $15 less]
and we decided to restyle my cut so that I could go 8 weeks...
without looking shaggy... what a relief !

so when I went to pay, she would only take $25...
I have always tipped her & now she wouldn't let me...

she said,"You've been good to me all these years...
now it's my turn to give back to you...
when you get in a better financial place, then you can tip again..."

I gave her one of my "organizing" business cards...
and she said, "Do you do garages ?"...
not heavy clean-out, but decluttering all the stuff...
that her kids have stored there as well as just simplifying her own stuff...

so she's going to call me...
this is my 4th "maybe job"...
so I hope something comes through soon...
if I can successfully help her...
there will be word of mouth advertising that could be very useful...

thanking Wendy again for her kindness...
I got into my car & thanked God for His goodness...

encouraged, I steeled myself to venture into WallyWorld...
where I found the 20lb containers of my chosen kitty litter...
at an unheard-of $6.50 each !!! [I got 6]
[they are close to $10.50 in most other stores]

I found the Excedrin B&B I really needed for much less...
and the body wash I was almost out of, for $3 each[about $1.50 less]

I found the green pepper I wanted for $.50 per lb...
the red onion for $.65 p/lb & a couple of other things, cheap...

at the check-out, I used up my $50 gift card...
then tried to use the $100 one...
it wouldn't go through...
probably because the bill was more than the card value...

the people in line behind me were patient...
the checker was nice, but I had to give-up & use my ATM debit card...

later, the gift card wouldn't go through at a gas pump either...

it came with a sticker saying that it was active...
so I'm just assuming that if I'd used it first at WW...
it would have worked, but I used up the other...
and I seem to remember that no gift cards work "at the pump"...

c'est la guerre... I'm just assuming that God has other plans for this card...

so, BC, if you thought that you'd ruin my day with that pathetic fent...

I say again...



*spfffbbbbtttttttt* !!!!

"Do You Smell What I Smell?"[the grocery bag song..CC#9

another one of my favorites, first published 11/14/07...
it features the irascible Sneaky Pie & her late sister Gracie...
who died 12/22/08, & is missed every day by all...

enjoy...


Said Gra-cie to Sneak-y and the rest ....
"Do you smell what I smell ?" [do you smell what I smell...]
in these groc-ery bags, there is meat !....
and al-so some cat-nip ! [and also some catnip !]
There's beef, in here....and may-be chicken ,ooh !, ev-en
some of those crunchies I love too !
ev-en some of those crunchies I love too.

Said Sneaky Pie to Gracie, in the bag.....
I'll keep watch while you snoop [but you bet-ter share,you poop !]
rat-tle, rat-tle, crunch- tear-ing, RIP ! [rat-te,rattle,RIP !]
ooh, I just found some ground beef [joy, joy, rap-ture, bliss!] you
bet-ter share, or you'll be so-or-ry 'cause
I'll make Mom come, just wait and see ! I'll get
Mom, if you won't share with me !

said Gracie, with her mouth all full of beef,
munphf, mumphf, chomp, chomp, "eat shit !" [gob-ble, gob-ble ,eat shit]
Sneaky said, "I'm telling, wait and see !"
Gracie gobbles faster [nothing much is left now]"you'll
get yelled at, you selfish , greed-y cat ! " Gracie
keeps on in her guzzl-ing spree, be-tween
bites, she smiles with catly glee...

said Sneaky Pie to Gracie as she scarfs,
"Do you hear what I hear ?" [HA !, that was the car door ]
Mom's back from the car, now you die ! [Grac-ie eat-ing fas-ter]
NOW, you're gon-na get it and you de-serve it, be-
cause you would-n't share the feast with me, I'll en-
joy your death from the cat tree, I'll love
watch-ing you get pun-ished for your spree !

yells Mom, to Gracie, in the bag
"GET OUT OF THERE, RIGHT NOW !" [if you know what's good for you !]you
fat and evil cat, you ate the beef
that I got for meatloaf [ now it all has "hit the fan"]stuffed
Grac-ie "glides" to a hid-ing place, t-o
laugh at Sneaks and clean her face , "hee,hee,-- he,he
hee,heeeeee, he hee , he heeee [burp, burp] he heee!

...I figured that BC would be showing-up about now

back in mid-August, this lovely trumpet vine blossom...
blazed in the summer sun...
behind it is my 20+ year old back fence & gate...
[this is the best picture I have of the gate...]



just to the left of this trumpet vine seed pod...
you can see the gate handle, on the left edge of this shot...
unfortunately, the scene of today's BC attack...

when it is wet, the old gate tends to sag a bit...
and stick, making it a chore to open with the key...
the gate has a turnbuckle on the frame side...
but that hasn't been adjusted in quite a while...
and I'm not sure I could tighten it any more with out breaking it...

so I wasn't surprised when the key wouldn't turn easily today...

when I get the trash ready to go to the curb for the Thursday AM pick-up...
I collect all the trash & cat box refuse in bags inside the back door...
there are 2 cat boxes there that are easy to clean from outside...
so I bring the can inside through the gate from the driveway...

and load it from the back door...
then reverse my path & take the can to the curb...

when I had everything piled by the back door...
I went out the front door, around into the driveway...
and prepared to move the can into the back...
that's when BC's fun began...

as I've said, I thought that the gate lock was just being stubborn...
not turning due to the wet wood and sagging gate...
then I heard a click, the key turned a bit...
then a bit more, but the dead bolt hadn't retracted...

I gave the gate a shake & tried again...
*snap*... the key turned freely...
around & around... the cylinder had snapped loose...
the dead bolt was still extended and the lock was broken...

"just what I don't need... another $100 expense..."I fumed...
[this lock is keyed to my house, so the replacement will need to be too]
just then, that little voice reminded me,"the key didn't break...
and the gate is locked shut..." and I realized just how nasty a bullet I'd dodged...



so feeling quite thankful after all...
I placed the open can up against the gate...
went back into the house, climbed over the bags...
opened the back door and crawled out...

ever mindful of Sneaky Pie...
[who operates in stealth mode around open doors...]
I proceeded to take 3 bags of trash, one at a time...
to the gate, lift them up over the fence...
& drop them into the open can on the other side...

all three went in without a snag...

then I cleaned the last 2 cat boxes...
and took that bag to the fence...
it was the smallest, but of course, given its contents...
it snagged on the edge of the can, ripping the bag, etc., etc., etc...

so after I went back out into the drive way...
dumped the torn bag into the can & scooped up the fallen mess...
with BC's laughter still resounding in my ears...
I took the can to the curb & cordially invited BC to return from whence he came...

next week, I'll call the locksmith who set this all up...
I had to replace the front door lock a couple of years ago...
so I'm pretty sure that it'll be $100/$150...
I have a credit card I can use, sigh...

but it's still better than all of that...
PLUS a broken key...[I do keep one at the church...
but this one works smoothly in all 3 locks]
PLUS the deadbolt could have been retracted...
[since my back security light is out...
that would have made me very vulnerable to intruders]...

so at risk of further annoyances from BC...



*pbbbbbbbbffffffffffffft* to you, BC, & all your minions too...

..."the 12 gifts of Cat-mas"...Cat-mas Carol #5 revisited[11/11/07]

my readers may tire of it, but I don't...
so here it is...back for it's third appearance...





On the 1st day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 2nd day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
2 nasty hairballs & a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 3rd day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 4th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 5th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
5 sh-red-ded plants...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 6th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
6 drool-soaked spiders...5 sh-red-ded plants...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 7th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
7 peed-on places, 6 drool-soaked spiders...
5 sh-red-ded plants...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 8th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
8 lizards dying, 7 peed-on places, 6 drool-soaked spiders...
5 sh-red-ded plants...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 9th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
9 evil glances, 8 lizards dying, 7 peed-on places, 6 drool-soaked spiders...
5 sh-red-ded plants...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 10th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
10 broken knick-knacks, 9 evil glances, 8 lizards dying,
7 peed-on places, 6 drool-soaked spiders...
5 sh-red-ded plants...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming}, 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 11th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
11 crapped-on letters, 10 broken knick-knacks, 9 evil glances,
8 lizards dying, 7 peed-on places, 6 drool-soaked spiders...
5 sh-red-ded plants...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

On the 12th day of Cat-mas, my kitties gave to me...
12 grasshoppers hopping, 11 crapped on letters,
10 broken knick-knacks, 9 evil glances, 8 lizards dying,
7 peed-on places, 6 drool-soaked spiders...
5 sh-red-ded plants...
4 piles of cat barf, 3 fish[NOT swimming], 2 nasty hairballs...
& a dead mousie by the TV...

...it's STILL there

some people will be relieved to see this...
others just mystified...

life is a mystery, deal with it :D

...blessings retrospective

my life has lately been like this persimmon tree...
while the leaves were green, then copper-colored...
they, though a pleasure to the eyes, hid the true blessings beneath...
and as the fruit has become ripe & the leaves dropped...
the birds now have a feast, since these people don't pick the fruit...

they don't gather the pecans that fall from their trees either...
which I gathered last winter and will do again soon...
they just planted an apple tree on the other side...
if they follow their pattern, I may get a few of them too...

but I digress...

in my long & unsuccessful search for a job these past 7 months...
there have been two jobs that I went after that I could have done very well...
the first was the high school band director in August...
the second was the librarian job in November...

I lost the band job because I was reluctant to go full-time...
which would have caused me to have to "un-retire" & stop my pension...
not a problem if the position lasts more than a year past the "un-retire" date...
because you can "un-retire", then retire again as many times as you want...
but an entire year must pass before you can retire again after "un-retiring"...

about 2 months after I would have started the job...
the school district announced cutbacks for the next year...
the job I would have had wasn't eliminated...
but as I had lost all my seniority, I would have been bumped...

my checks would have ended in June...
leaving me no way to pay my mortgage for months...
as I would probably have had to un-retire in October...
just before the budget cuts for the next year were announced...

leaving me with a real chance of loosing my house...
so had I not been so adamant about only wanting part-time...
I would have gotten that job [I was their 1st choice]...
and ultimately been as a friend so succinctly put it...
screwed...

then there was the librarian job...
Evenings & Weekends Supervisor...perfect for me...
Saturday & Sunday, afternoon into late nights...
with some "graveyard" [I'm a nightowl anyway...]

and then, in setting up our Ren.group rehearsal schedule for January & on...
Sunday evening became our only viable choice for a regular rehearsal day...
with Friday & Saturdays for extra or alternate practice times...
again, I would have been screwed...

the group could get along just fine without me as a quartet...
but I would have lost the chance to sing with them...
and that would have hurt me, a lot...
as I love being in this group...

I am amazed at the length that God goes to to protect me...
like keeping my pension coming...
even providing my heart's desires...
like being able to continue to sing with the Ren. group...

and I should already know this...
I've seen it so many times before in my life & the lives of others...
just now I'm seeing His loving & protective hand...
guide some friends through what is for many a time of great stress...
with an ease obviously blessed by His touch...

oh, there is still great effort needed on their part...
but doors open, opportunities appear...
help & support arrives...
and faith, hard work & planning are rewarded...

in His time, in His way, in His will...

so I'm quite confident that the promise He made me a few days ago...
that the new year would bring me renewed heath, increased wealth...
and the job that He has for me to do...
will be kept...

in His time, in His way, in His will...

God is very good, all the time...

...where's the white car NOW ?

back in their driveway, where it belongs [as of 12/26, anyway]...
[they DO have a garage, but if it's like mine... it's full of stuff...]

maybe... I could get my neighbor across the street...
to move his red pickup about 5 feet ahead...
then no one could park there at all...

on Christmas Eve, as I left for the 2nd service...
I had to navigate around an SUV the size of New Hampshire...
who had "parked" there, almost into my driveway...

I know where this is coming from...[BC]
and I've had enough...
I must be doing something right to warrant all this attention...

hmmmmm....

...a Christmas Eve Mass-adventure

it was a simple concept, write a post, go home & change...
come back and cantor for 2 Christmas Eve masses...

the continuing question of my throat health...
had me sucking on cough drops & drinking as much water as I could...
so when the post took longer than I thought it would...
I found myself still at the church at 4 PM[I had to start singing at 5...]

I went into the church to snag bulletins...
so I'd have the Gospel Acc. verse to cantor...
lit some candles, said some prayers and left...
only to bump into Fr Toolbelt as he arrived...

knowing that now I was really behind schedule [I HATE that...]
I hurried home[it's only 2 miles...]
ran inside ignoring the whining dog & meowing kitties...
went into my bedroom, let in the Piglet, changed clothes...
fed the kitties, gave Molly something to chew on and raced out the door...

back at the church, I realized that my stand light...
which I needed, was in my Ren. group bag, in my house...
with 5 minutes before "caroling" was to start, I went downstairs...
but couldn't find any of our clip-on lights...

I went back upstairs, placed my music stand, hymnal, carol list...
cough drops & water bottle in the center & began to lead the carols...
fortunately, there were several strong male voices at the 1st service...
so when my voice decided that "d" was too high and "middle c" was too low...
[which happened after the 2nd verse of "Joy to the World", the 2nd carol...]
they did OK when I had to drop out from time to time...

on the next to last carol["In the Bleak Midwinter"]...
as I was having to hold my hymnal up close because of bad light...
Fr Toolbelt, on his way to vest for Mass, turned on a "side spot"...
problem solved... I could see, now if only I could sing...

the caroling complete, we moved into the Mass itself...
there was an obnoxious intonation problem in certain stops on the organ...
which grated on all my nerves, but it couldn't be fixed during a service...
so I gritted my teeth and carried on... [it was really bad...]

I cantored the Gospel Acc.[we said the Psalm]
and led the singing for the Offertory hymms & 2 Communion hymns...
during the dismissal, which was,"Hark, the Herald Angels Sing" [more "d's"]
I suddenly remembered that I was supposed to tell the organist...
to go to a softer stop for verse 3, leading into the "Silent Night"...

I sidled over to the organ during verse 2...
and whispered, "go to a softer stop for verse 3"...
since you often need to repeat things for him...
I was astonished when he pressed a stop button before vs3...
and verse 3 ["mild He lays His glory by..."] began much more softly...

this quiet ending to the service, was why I didn't play trumpet this year...
we decided that it was just too much bravado...
and not the contemplative atmosphere Fr TB wanted to create...
there was no organ postlude either for the same reason...

then Fr Toolbelt played his guitar from the back of the church...
and led us in,"Silent Night" & when my voice quit because it was so low...
I "ooo-ed" an impromptu obbligato on the third verse
we were all thinking,"cool, just like that Christmas Eve when it was written"...
but we had NO idea then just how much closer...
to THAT Christmas Eve we'd get before it was over...

after discussing the organ's pitch issues, we decided to tune it later...
I got home before 7 & rested until 9:30 when I went back to the church...

I set-up my stand, with the light I'd remembered this time...
we tuned the stops on the "great" that had been so bad...
and then things began to spiral out of control...



Supersop, who is the consummate pro, couldn't find her music...
then I began to realize that with 1 sop, 2 alti, 2 tenors, 1 bass...
[& a partridge in a pear tree...]
that we really couldn't sing the anthem we'd planned to sing...
we had already moved the Clavanova down, but it wasn't in the way...

about this time, we discovered a few "discrepancies"in the bulletin...
Bassoprofundo asked,"why are the opening & closing hymns the same?"
we, the choir, were discussing whether or not to "bag" the printed anthem...
and go with a hymn, etc., etc., etc.

when suddenly, a loud sustained note from the organ took us by surprise...
the most surprised was the organist...
as he was 10 feet away from the console at the time...

it was a cypher...

a cypher on an organ is an involuntary sounding of a note or notes which may continue ad infinitum...

since it was just past time to start the caroling for the late service...
we went ahead, but on "Joy to the World", BC started screaming through the organ...
it was a very LOUD cypher and didn't stop...
so I cut off the singing, the organist moved over to the Clavanova...
and we carried on, using it all the way through the service...

I had put Supersop on alert...
and soon had to call her up to help me lead the carols...
the altar party was ready in the back of the church when we finished...
& I had happily remembered to announce the number of the opening hymn...

after the nice Christmas Proclamation, they moved to the Creche to bless it...
as they arrived[it was in front up on the raised area, on a table]
Fr Toolbelt turned and said something to me which I didn't get...
then he said it again, louder,"Go get Jesus !"
Father G pointed to the back corner of the church...
where I could see SquarePeg moving with stealthy quickness...

she picked-up something, turned and handed it to me...
it was the Baby Jesus for the manger...
feeling a bit like a mid-wife, I gimped back up the side aisle...
and handed Jesus to Fr TB, who placed Him in His manger...

then as we sang the correct opening carol,"O Come, All Ye Faithful"...
the altar party processed around the sanctuary...
[did I mention that there was incense ? not too much...
but at this point, any, was too much...

the altar was glorious with poinsettias and resplendent with greens...
all the candles were lit & the congregational attendance was respectable...

over in the choir pews however, I was changing stuff left & right...
the singers had decided that they weren't comfortable with the listed anthem...
so we replaced it with "Lo How a Rose"...
which was in the bulletin as our Communion piece...

we replaced "Lo", with the first Communion hymn from the early service...
"O Little Town" [Forest Green]
which had been left out of the late service...
because the choir would be there...

so without disturbing the worship service...
I had to make sure that every singer knew what we were doing...
then there was the organist, whose folder we had to "fix"...
all the while, keeping part of my brain focused on what was happening...

'cause I had to cantor, any time now, the Psalm and the Gospel Acc. verse...
which wasn't printed in the late bulletin...
[fortunately, I'd noticed this before the service...
and snagged an old early service bulletin out of the trash]

finally past my specific cantoring tasks...
I readied myself for the choir "anthem"...
one of the alti wasn't real familiar with the irregularities of the alto part...
on "Lo, How a Rose", so I gave her my hymnal, which is marked...
I used the L&C copy from my folder...

I also told Supersop, who had sang a lot to help me through the caroling...
that after verse 1, where I'd sing alto to show them how, if they'd forgotten...
[which as it turned out, was a very good idea on my part...]
I'd join her on soprano [not my favorite thing...]

things went fine for the anthem...

I decided to do verses 1,2,3,5 of "O Little Town..."[Forest Green]
for the Communion & it was a perfect fit...
we moved into "Hark"...
and the wimpy Clavanova didn't even need dialing down for verse 3...

as the final strains of "Silent Night" wafted off, I could hardly keep my eyes open...
all the singers were amazed at how ironic it was...
that we had planned the guitar/Silent Night...
and THEN, the organ went "on the fritz"...

we all had a good "irony" chuckle, wished each other a Merry Christmas...
I thanked the stalwart singers, inwardly laughing at BC for his efforts...
and just about jumped out of my skin when the organ suddenly screamed again...
hair on end, I looked to see the organist, shutting it off & saying...
"well, I guess it's still cyphering"... [he is a master of understatement]

After dropping off MZYBee, I went home...
crawling into bed well after midnight...
where I stayed all Christmas Day, mostly sleeping...
occasionally awakening to re-inflate my stupid bed...

far and away, the weirdest Christmas I've ever spent...

BC was there, but God was good, anyway...

..."The Catsinger in Winter"

caveat lector: there is both complaining & venting [aka bitching & moaning] within...as well as some really good things



things at chéz Catsinger have been trés interéssant as of late...
I've been getting the message to remain on the path I'm on...
and that my obedience will be rewarded beyond anything that I can imagine...

now, I can imagine a lot...
and with any other source...
I'd just dismiss it as hyperbole...
but with God, not a good idea...

lots of things have happened...
nice things, needed things, hoped-for things...

the night before Christmas Eve, I was invited to go caroling...
I love caroling, [singing in general, especially with others]...
so I went, even though I began to realize that the cold, damp night air...
would do a number on what little voice I had left...
after 4 straight days of singing, a lot...

the caroling was to happen, "a ways" from where we gathered...
so we took off walking, briskly...
I'm a little gimpy, so I fell behind rapidly...
Mr.GT kindly hung back to walk with me...
though I assured him, [twice] that I was OK walking alone...

I was really out of breath when we reached the others...
and after a couple of carols, when my breathing was back to normal...
I had to face the fact that if I sang then...
I'd have NO voice for the 2 Christmas Eve services I had to do the next night...

bidding the carolers a reluctant farewell...
I walked, much more slowly, back to my car...
the fast pace had loosened my back & legs...
which made me realize that I needed to walk faster when I walk...

I felt OK until Christmas Eve[a whole 'nother post]...
then was really "tight & sore" again...

I spent all Christmas Day sleeping & resting...
at night, after listening to the first act of "La Boheme" on NPR...
I watched,"It's a Wonderful Life", which I'd seen many times before...
but this time, paying attention, & I enjoyed it very much...

part of my back problems come from my bed...
my Select Comfort bed, which was wonderful for about 4 years...
has become a problem, as it won't hold it's inflation level...
for more than an hour or so...
causing me to wake up, bottomed-out...
with all sorts of back pain & stiffness I never had before...

the bed used to cure the problems...
now it's causing the problems AND interrupting my sleep cycle doing it...

I've called customer service & gotten the big brush-off...
someone left me a comment recently to call back...
which I will do next week...there is a 20 year limited warranty...
and this better be covered, or I'm in trouble, big time...

on this day, the Saturday after Christmas, last year...
I dislocated my finger in 2 places & spent a while in emergency rooms...
[Dr's offices, surgery, Physical Therapy]
I can't remember if I fell down, I think perhaps I did...
'cause my back & leg problems really started then...
exacerbated by the stupid bed problems...

and stress does NOT help...
had just a bit of that this past year...

this morning, God told me that the coming year...
would be a time of renewed health, an increased supply of money...
[my "money tree", which seemed dead has sent out some new growth !]
and work for me to do, so I'm hopefully optimistic...

my current regime of self-discipline & obedience has borne some fruit...
and I'm hopeful, grateful & trusting Him for all I need...
and as the regime continues, with no end in sight...
I continue to experience quiet miracles & answers to prayer...

since the bed problems, I'm very sore & stiff when I get up...

I have searing pain right in the middle of my lower back...
severe weakness & muscle cramps in my left thigh...
& a sharp grinding pain in both hip joints...

today, it was so bad that I had to hold onto things...
to make my way through the house...
I took the Excedrin, the joint stuff & the calcium...
along with over a liter of water...

I made my way into the shower where the hot water helped...

I gimped back into my bedroom, read the morning office & got dressed...
still in a lot of pain, I made my way to the back door...
& let Molly back in [she'd been doing her business & barking at bluejays]
I gimped back to the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed...

I reminded God that I needed to go walking...
being told to trust & believe, I got up...
and was around the bed when I realized that, there was NO pain !
none at all... I went from hardly moving to no problem...

so I went out walking, briskly, I might add...
it's easier when someone is talking to you, but I managed...
my left leg is still having weakness issues...
riding a stationary bike or using a thighmaster machine would help...
but I have no money for that stuff or a gym membership...
so plain, old walking will have to do...

and as I walked around the 'hood, there wasn't much of fall left...




the Narnia tree [because of the lamppost] has only a few remaining laves...



while the tree across the street still has most of its leaves...
many that haven't even turned yet...



these trees that were a blaze of red so recently, are now totally bare...



the Morning Glory vines that infiltrated the redwoods...
and made it through last winter, are dead from the freeze...



though the cold & damp agrees with the redwoods...
whose base is sending up sprouts all over the place...



the birds are having a feast of Nandina berries...



persimmons, now visible as the coppery leaves have dropped...



and pyracanthius berries, with their prickly, holly shaped leaves...



not so much for the birds with the Meyer lemons, though...
which are OK because I covered them during the freeze...
so I'm picking these to give away... yumm...

God is good, all the time...

...oops, part, le deux et trois

I took this shot on 12/23...
the neon nativity was up...
but the tree of lights was just begun...



here's a close-up of the "stage 2" nativity...



and on Christmas Eve, the "stage 3" tree of light was finito...

so far so good, but today is only the 2nd day of Christmas...
so we'll see... but at this point, "less" looks really nice...
nice job celebrating Christ-mas, UnklePhil !!

...working without a net

one of my favorite films, "The Lion in Winter",[1968]
has a scene near the end where the Princes Geoffrey & Richard...
wait in the dungeon for their father, King Henry to come to execute them...

upon hearing someone approach & being exhorted by his brother...
"to die like a man", Geoffrey says...
"You fool, it matters not at all how a man falls down..."
his brother Richard counters with...
"if falling down is all that is left, it matters a great deal"...

the red leaves in this picture remind me of that...
as they, the few that remain, will burn brightly until they drop...

they inspire me, as does the quote & the promises of God...
to see things through to the end, to not just give up the fight...
and for "The Catsinger in Winter", miracles are happening because of it...

even after my conversion experience, over 40 years ago...
I, "wasn't there yet"... head knowledge, heart feelings...
a lot of stems & branches, flowers & leaves...
not much strong root growth...

any farmer or gardener will tell you...
that if all the energy goes into the top...
the roots don't develop properly...
you may get some fruits or blossoms...
but not many... and not good quality...

then, if any adverse conditions come along...
the tops will wither & die...
and if the roots aren't strong, the plant dies too...

one way to encourage strong root development, is by pruning...
removing some of the extra growth so that the plant's energy...
will be redirected into root development...
and better fruit & blossoms...
my faith was like that...
in need of pruning & root development...

I've gone through several "rebirths" in my faith journey...
since the initial conversion point...
the most recent being the most complete...
because God was tired of my messing around...
so He sent me, "the voice of reckoning" who hasn't shirked their duties...

being shown my shortcomings in God's plan for me so vividly...
by seeing the effects on someone I cared for, was devastating...
at first, I didn't understand what I'd done that caused such a reaction...
but with time, some things became clearer...

but I still didn't get it... and reverted back old habits...
creating a stressful situation for all involved...
there were times of relative peace...
but then something would happen & I would do stupid, selfish things...
that would drive away anyone...

anyone, that is, but one sent by a loving Father...
to help me out of the hole that I didn't know I was still in...

I have always had a real problem with self-esteem, self-image...
and self-loathing was a default position for me...
last summer, after an unsuccessful & embarrassing job interview failure...
I allowed myself to become despondent...

depression, anger, self-centeredness, self-pity...
all escalated into lashing out at those...
who with hands & hearts outstretched to me...
sought only to cheer & comfort...

I was a total jerk, spewing all sorts of mean-spirited vitriol...

after one too many of my toxic, narcissistic rants...
"the voice of reckoning" cut off all communication...

I was confused & what I thought were cryptic comments...
"toxic relationship", "ego-centric"...
went right past me when I first saw them...

however, in a day or so...
God revealed the truth behind the "ego-centric/narcissistic" comments...
and in a moment of clarity... I saw what "TVOR" had meant by it...

I WAS self-involved, I ranted without listening...
I looked for someone to listen as I vented...
never giving the listener a chance to get a word in...
[OK once in a while, not good for a relationship...]

it was all about me...

of course, I hadn't seen it... I was so into "me" that nothing else existed...

so for the last 4 months or so, God's been working on that within me...
as I have grown closer to Him, hopefully I have become more like Him...
and I think that I'm getting better, but it's a journey...
not a destination... and I must continue to grow into His vision for me...
without the usual slides back into the mode of, "you're doing it again"...

the whole "toxic" thing had escaped me...

in my usual blasé manner...
I just figured that it was the narcissism that was toxic...
which it is... but there was more...
and God again used "TVOR" to nudge me in the right direction...

I was griping about having to wear a dress for the Renaissance group...
going on about how I'd always hated dresses, my past, etc., etc., etc....
and a voice in my head [that sounded suspiciously like TVOR...] said...
"just suck it up & get over it"...
which I put in the post that I was writing at that time...

I didn't think too much of it at the time...
but later, when "TVOR" congratulated me for "sucking it up"...
and was very supportive about my costume & attitude...
I had an epiphany...

my jaw literally dropped open...
& I sat in stunned silence at the workings of God...
in awe of the extent to which He had gone to to make His point...
in a way that I would finally understand...

[for someone who is NOT stupid, I can really be a dork sometimes...]

what was toxic to TVOR [& everyone else who would never tell me...]
was my self-loathing & all the verbal expressions of it...

it's hard to be around someone you care about who hates herself...

extremely toxic... most people just cut & run...

courageous souls sent by God...
[like TVOR...]
will tell you how bad you make them feel...
then pray for you despite all that...

I, unfortunately, know this too well...
because I took the usual, easy way out with my Dad...
who died separated from those he loved, who loved him...
all because he couldn't accept himself as lovable...
& allow people, or God, to love him...

I didn't try to help him...
I didn't know how...
so I ended up just like him...
wanting more, but incapable of allowing people to love them...

since the previous 4 months of work had brought me to a place...
where I could accept myself as worthy of love...
this now all made sense...

realizing this truth makes working on my other relationship problems...
[insecurity, need for external validation/attention, social awkwardness...]
seem not so daunting, even manageable...
especially if I can trust God to pull me past them...

I've always been a "critical" person...into the details...
I don't like being surprised by learning that I've been fooling myself...
so to have someone who tells me the unvarnished truth...
and shows me what a jerk I've been/am being, though NOT easy for either of us...
is truly, a gift of God & an ultimate blessing for me...

a true servant calling for them...
I would add, well & faithfully done...
& so very much appreciated...

I continue to be filled with gratitude to God for all His blessings...
I am humbled by the continuing efforts of all His servants on my behalf...
I am, a work in progress & hope someday to become the person He's leading me to be...
with as little further aggravation as possible to those He's sent to prune me...

"not thinking less of myself...
but thinking of myself, less..."

then perhaps I will be able to "fall down well"...
having finally become a good & faithful servant myself...

God is so good, all the time...

...uh,oh...

it was dark when I returned home the other day...
& as I pulled into my driveway, I saw it...
glowing malevolently in UnklePhil's porch flower box...
positioned so I can't miss seeing it from my kitchen windows...



the tacky flamingo, once again was glowing with holiday splendor...
at least the other one has disappeared...
& this one's Santa hat is nowhere in sight...
[please, DO NOT consider this a "challenge"...]



[here it is in daylight...it's solar, so it's tacky, 24/7...]

then, on Sunday, as Fr Toolbelt encouraged everyone...
to visit their neighbors during the holidays...
and invite them to our services...
I turned around & playfully invited MY neighbor, UnklePhil...
[who sits behind me in the choir]
to come to a service...

not to be outdone [when is he ever... outdone, that is...]
he later informed me that he would have to miss L&C...
because he was visiting "his neighbor to the north"...
[that would be me... sigh...]
and planned to "help decorate while she wasn't home"...

my relief that he would be at L&C after all, passed quickly...
as I realized the impending resumption of the "Light Wars"...
[lights were flashing in my head...
& a mechanical voice intoned,"danger, Catsinger, danger..."]

FYI: last year, in order to "help" me get in a festive mood...
UnklePhil festooned my house & yard with assorted, tacky, seasonal neon...
things so tacky, even he didn't use them anymore...
all because I dissed his precious flamingii...

so in an attempt to head off more "helpful decorating"...
I told him that in order not to go broke...
paying my electric bill...[which is true]
I wasn't even putting up my lights on the lemon tree this year...
so he agreed to "refrain" from random acts of decoration...
which was a relief... for a while...

you might say that I'm waiting for the "other holiday bulb to light"...
[if I may coin a metaphor...]

he said that he wasn't going to decorate, "much", this year...
but that the "tree of lights" would get done...

this is my 21st Christmas, here...
and he's always had a "seasonal reaction" break out about now...

so we'll see... and if he has a major seasonal reaction...
they'll see the glow in the "sleepy village 13 miles to the north"...
as will Santa in the sleigh, any astronauts in orbit...
and all the angels on high...

POSTSCRIPT...

after writing this on 12/22 to post on 12/24, I returned home to find this...



an "UnklePhil Seasonal Disorder Reaction" in full swing...




he claims that this is only,"phase one"...
"phase two" will be the neon Nativity on the lower roof...
"phase three", the "tree of lights"[the big liquid amber]...

we'll just see if that's all...
if not, they'll probably "see" the glow in Ahnoldtown...

...Renaissance concert afterglow

[this photo is titled;"Wandering in the Woodes so Wylde...
after the piece of Renaissance keyboard music of William Byrd]

last night's concert was really fun...

the venue was just perfect, there was a nice audience...
and we sang well...[we even made a few bucks, whoo hoo !]

I have no pictures of me in my costume...
but hope to have some to share soon...
I was told that it looked good...
as did MizMinka's new costume, which I like a lot...

the others were wearing their usual...

Trumpetman resembles Henry,VIII...
so he dresses as you've seen "Henry, VIII" in paintings...
Bassodude has 2 costumes; last night he wore the "Friar's" robes...
SilverSop dresses as a "Tudor Noblewoman", with a fancy gown...

so with MM, as the "saucy maid"...
and me as an "older, tavern serving woman"...
[I'm too old to be a proper wench...]

we're quite the "consort of characters"...

we try to keep things, "period"...
[since 4 of the 5 of us wear glasses...
it's not a rigid situation, but we do try where we can...]

so when, at the dress rehearsal...
I realized that my plastic water bottles...
just looked wrong...
I looked for something more organic looking...
and spotted MM's blue one, which had always been glass...
[they're now plastic, but still look like glass...]

I asked MM if she had another one like hers that I could borrow...



and when I came out to set-up last night, there it was...
waiting for me, but with an unexpected treat ...



in honor of my part as the "cat" in the "Counterpoint of the Animals"...
a cute "cat sticker" !
and I even got to keep the bottle...
[thanks, MM...]

so it was, a VERY, fun evening...

I really enjoy singing this music with these people...
I always have wanted to be in a group like this one...
and I do SO appreciate the opportunity they have given me...

I just can't wait to get together & sing again...

and you definitely can't, always say that about musical groups...

...oops

so yesterday evening, as I was resting before the Ren.group concert...
Molly started going ballistic, bringing me out of my bedroom...
just in time to see a flat bed truck, with THE WHITE CAR on it...
start backing into my northside neighbor's driveway...

I went outside, went over to a man, that I'd never seen before...
who was telling the driver to leave the car in the driveway...
I introduced myself & discovered that the car was his son's...
[who I had never seen drive, only ride a motorcycle...]

I apologized and told him that it had not only been parked for 4 months...
in front of my house, giving me NO place to put my trash cans...
but that it had sat for a week with a pink warning notice on the windshield...
before it was taken away...

the "Dad" was very nice although I could tell he wasn't too pleased...
he told me that to get the car back had cost $200...
I apologized again & said that if I'd known it was his son's car...
I would have just asked him to move it...

he said that his son was in the wrong for leaving it sit so long...
he also understood how annoying it had been for me...
to have to stop & deal with a garbage can in my driveway for 4 months...
then he said that his son was going to donate the car...
in a couple of months anyway...

??!! why even bring it back ?... this is the end of the tax year... !
or wait until the first week of January for next year...




so for now, here it sits...
the car that won't just, "go away..."



at least I can put out my recyclables can this week...
it's very full...

come to think of it, I now have no more excuses NOT to prune my roses...
cut back the trumpet vine, pull-up the dead tomato plants...
clean off the porch, etc, etc, etc...

sigh...

UPDATE:

last night I heard them trying to start it [it didn't]...
but they managed to move it out of the driveway, onto the street...
but, in front of their house, what a concept !



it should be mentioned that it never occurred to me...
that the car belonged to them...
because for the last 4 months that it was in front of my house...
there was nothing in front of theirs...

...finally gone !!

yesterday, UnklePhil called me to let me know...
that he had followed-up with a call to the Mudville cops...
and that the white car which had been in front of my house...
since mid-August...
leaving me no "garbage can space"...
would be "gone" later that day...

since I took the call on my cell...
& had just gone past the white car...
as I backed out of my driveway...
I thought,"good riddance !"...

and when I returned home...



I found this...

some debris & dead leaves were all that was left...

Thanks to the Mudville cops...

and...

Many Thanks, UnklePhil !
for following through...

..."come one, come all... and be ye merry ! "

tonight is our Renaissance group's concert in Mudville...
[7:30 PM, Grace Methodist Church, Lincoln, n.of Harding & free...]
this will be my first concert with them...
and I'm so looking forward to it...
[quite the departure for me, who's been in hundreds...
perhaps even thousands, of performances...]



we begin with me, in the front of the church...
playing a fanfare on the natural, [no valves], trumpet...
[mine looks just like this one, but with a dark green cord...]
then I ring handbells as the other 4 singers/musicians...
[SilverSop, MizMinka, Trumpetman & BassoDude]...
process in from the back, singing, "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel...

and the merriment will proceed from there...

the church is just the right size for us...
effective lighting, good style for this period of music...
stucco walls & a dark wood vaulted ceiling...
cozy, but with a lovely echo, for that, "cathedral sound"...

all the seats are good for sight lines and sound...
but the very best seats are in the small balcony...

it will be a nice program, just the right length...
with a brief intermission...
featuring various groupings of voices...
we will sing & play a variety of Renaissance music...
secular, as well as sacred, including Christmas selections from the period...

I generally don't get nervous for performances anymore...
unless I'm unprepared, the music is really hard...
I'm sick, injured or hampered by equipment problems in some way...
and, I suppose, I AM, a bit of a "ham"...

so, I just don't worry...
["been there, done that"...]
it never helps anyway...

singing this music with this group is SO much fun...
[though I don't want to screw-up...]
I just focus on the music & don't think about anything else...
we've rehearsed, we know our parts & we sound good...

it will be what it will be...

so it's time to just focus, relax & have fun...
[that guarantees the audience a good time too...]

speaking of, "fun"...



I may have even gotten past the, "wearing a dress" angst...
it is, after all, a costume...so I'm, sucking it up & getting over it...
especially since SquarePeg so kindly did her sewing/ironing magic...
on my costume last night...

I'm rarely too happy with my general appearance...
dresses exacerbate these feelings...
[never been a, "girly-girl", though Mom tried...
come to think of it, maybe that's why I hate dresses...
I know that's why I loathe "pink"...]

anyway, I knew that my dress needed some TLC...
but I don't sew or even own an iron...
[I DO know about iron-on hemming tape...]
and I couldn't afford a regular seamstress...
so SquarePeg came to my rescue yesterday...

I took the dress, etc. to the church office, put it on over my jeans...
and SP & I tugged, adjusted, folded, measured & marked the problems...
some of which could be helped with a "better undergarment support system"...
[I have a new bra that was always too tight, today it fit, problem solved...]

so today, when I arrived at the church office...



there it was ! all finished & freshened...
and I felt a heavy weight lift from my shoulders...



you can see that the chemise is still too long...
but yesterday, we discovered that it can be tucked-up...
so it isn't longer than the skirt...



she had doubled over the hem of the "dress"...
securing it with the iron-on hemming tape...
hopefully, preventing me from pulling a total klutz move by tripping over it...



she had stitched a couple of decorative-looking pleats...
in the formerly H-U-G-E neck of the chemise...
keeping our "rating" for this performance as "PG"...
rather than the "R" it was headed for...
[SuperBowl half-time clothing malfunction style...]



removed about 5 inches of fabric from the chemise sleeves...
[if they had been "batwings", we might have gathered the top...]



and, [my favorite thing...]
sewed a big, strong hook & eye at the waist, below the cinch laces...
this will visually give me a waist, [such as it is...]
and allow the skirt to fall normally...
without me cinching my front laces too tight...
so I can still breathe & sing......
[we don't mess with the ones in the back...]



of course, I'll still need some deft fingers [& thumbs..]
to make sure that everything, "topside", is secure...
that's what these are for...

so tonight, when I get dressed at the church...
I'll feel a lot better about my costume...
and after the trumpet fanfare...
[the natural trumpet is a "slippery beast"...]
I can just relax, listen to & sing this amazing music...
with these gifted musicians... what fun !

Gloria in excelsis Deo...

...Lessons & Carols, the afterglow

[my favorite window in our church]

this years edition of Lessons & Carols...
was truly a blessing for all who were there...
the singers were blessed as well as the listeners...
and no one more than myself...
who is blessed by being able to serve in this way...

voices lifted in song, praising God for His incredible gift to us...

the spirit of the singers as well as the songs...
being used by God to bless and create that perfect moment...
that symbolized the Great Mystery of the birth of God on Earth...
"Gloria, in excelsis, Deo"


"...for where ever 2 or more are gathered in My name...
I will be in the midst of them..."


...and He was...

God is good, all the time...