Thursday, February 14, 2008

...from heart ...to heart...

I received a valentine yesterday...
not one of those culturally contrived things...
that have taken the idea of expressing affection
WAY beyond the basic idea...
into the realm of commerce...
no... this was a real one...from God...

I've been battling myself for about 2 months now...
dealing with my "problems"...
trying to give all my thoughts and actions
into His control...

I have "good" days...when my trust is firm...
filled with peace, joy and purpose....
and "not so good" days...when the enemy
uses any possible opening to hit my "fear" button...

the fact that in all this personal turmoil, I have managed
to hurt a dear friend and damage a relationship,
causing great pain for another dear friend,
has given the enemy a lot of fuel for his sulphurous fires...
the smoke from which cloud my judgement...
and distract me from my path...

I must believe that all of this aggravation
happened for a reason...that God can use this broken mess....
to further His plan for me...to teach me...
and that I feel this pain and remorse so strongly at times...
because I am "growing"...changing...and that's good...
I just wish that there was a lot less "colateral damage" to those I love...

I was having a very hard time yesterday...
fear kept intruding on my attempts to surrender to His peace...
I found myself revisiting my sins...and the pain I've caused...
so following some always good advice...I prayed...

and as I prayed...suddenly, God spoke to me...
very clearly..."fill your heart with love"...
I sat up, opened my eyes and said, "what?"...
and it came again..."fill your heart with love..."
and then continued, "a heart filled with My love
has no room for fear, or doubt, or guilt, or grief,
or anything...but Me...and My love for each of you..."

my soul was flooded with an unspeakable joy...
I wept...tears of ecstacy streaming down my cheeks...
sobs of pure happiness wracking my body...
all traces of fear, doubt, grief and guilt...gone...
and in it's place...absolute joy...
"the sun broke through the clouds..."

so on this "day of love", I thought
that I would share this very personal
"valentine" with whomever may read this...

may Almighty God, in Jesus Christ, fill your
heart, life, mind and soul so full of His love,
that there will be NO room...
for any other thought than the fullness of His love for you...

4 comments:

A Square Peg said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
catsinger said...

sorry "SP"...I hit the wrong button...thanks for the nice comment, though...I know how you feel...

DearestDragonfly said...

"...fill your heart with love..." The Holy Spirit speaks here.

What a profound, earth-shattering heart-lens with which to view and transform everything in this weary life.

Anonymous said...

Sure wish I could have been there to see that! I know it must have been a wonderful feeling!