...I'm almost afraid to look

Well, I've been, uh, distracted... so I haven't been here in a while...

My back went out, then I was sick... much of the summer passed in a medicated haze.
Then on August 11, I took MsYBee to the eye doctor in Jerrytown and after I dropped her off but before I got home, the transmission of my car had a major "episode", thunking and stopping suddenly as if I had hit a momentary brick wall. The "drive" indicator was flashing[not good...] and the tach was jumping around like crazy.
I managed to get home and discovered that after turning the motor off, then on again, the drive light no longer flashed.

At this point, I figured that the timing belt I had elected not to replace last April was becoming an issue, but, I had NO money at that time to go get it checked out, so I waited until my pension checks came in, driving as little as possible because when I did, after only a mile or so, the problems returned, scaring me, so I just stayed home.On Sept.1, pension checks in the bank, I went to the dealer. They weren't sure what was wrong, but tried an "inexpensive" solution [$232.34] by replacing the 4th gear switch, hoping it would be that simple. It wasn't. After they tested it, they came back to tell me that the whole transmission was going out and would need to be replaced, to the tune of $4000.00, oh... and now it wouldn't shift into reverse anymore...

I was stunned... $4000 might as well have been $4,000,000... I had no way of getting that much money. So I "limped" home, hazard flashers blinking, not exceeding 35 mph,
being passed by irate drivers with cars that worked and clinching my teeth at each "shift" and the accompanying jolt. Since they had had problems getting it to go in reverse, I had to park on the street so I would be able to move. I knew that God had a plan to provide me with the money to fix my car, no other scenario seemed even feasible,but I had NO idea how He would provide the money.

Then I had a phone call from my cousin. He's 8 years older than I and we have never been close, but he had called once during July because he's researching our genealogy and he had some questions for me. He called back, because he had made plans to visit some distant relatives who lived in the foothills and wondered if I wanted to go. I had told him that I was in Chpt.13 the first time he called, so he understood when I told him that I really had no money for traveling at this point, so he volunteered to pay for the overnight accommodations and travel expenses. Since I knew that he's well off and just wanted company, I agreed. At some point in our conversation, I mentioned my car and we discussed the various possibilities. At this point he offered to lend me the money. I told him that I couldn't afford to pay him back and he said,"Just give me your pink slip and that will do fine for me".

I was almost speechless. We've never been close and I would have never asked him to lend me the money, though he really is quite able, financially. Later that day, I got an email saying,"The check's in the mail". I got it Monday, deposited it Tuesday and am having my car repaired tomorrow[Friday]. Interestingly, my cell phone died the evening that he had called me. I mean, really dead... as in go to the Sprint store and get a new one dead.

Hummm... the phone hangs on long enough to get my cousin's call and provide the money to fix my car, then dies... I go to the Sprint store because there I can be billed for the new phone, which I just got today. Hummmm...

what next...

...time sure flies when you're "having fun"

...or as my friend Lucyfur would say, "has it been a year already?"

A year of dealing with the culmination of several years of my personal financial woes which now finds me in bankruptcy with no chance of modifying my mortgage and living on a very small fixed income with no job in sight.

I don't want to seem ungrateful, because I'm glad to be finally at a place of resolution, but I must say that I'm glad that the government funding crisis was resolved and I didn't have to find out how I'd do without Social Security. I'm sure that God has me where He wants me and will provide all I need. Now I need to retrain myself to be satisfied with what I have and curb all my desires for that which I cannot afford, which is most everything, "extra"...

It's been a long and peculiar journey so far and now I seem to be becoming more isolated. I can only believe that it's "part of the plan"...

I wonder where I'll be at this time next year?

...remembrances of things past

I normally don't post pictures that show clear shots of faces, but since I'm not going to name anyone pictured, I don't think anyone will mind.

Remembering music made, laughter shared and a bond ordained in heaven and forged in joy... or to paraphrase Shakespeare...
"... he[or she] who sheds his blood[makes music] with me will be my brother[sister]...
and those who were here, will stand taller when this day is mentioned..."

[I did warn you that I was paraphrasing... OK... rewriting... but the sentiment is the same...]

...good news... and not-so-good news

Any homeowner has dealt with this situation... that your home, being in most cases the most expensive investment you'll ever make, will appreciate and depreciate in value, as the economy ebbs and flows. Since mid 2004, things have been unbelievably unpredictable. By the middle of 2005, my small house had a market value of over $400 K... I paid $85K for it in 1988... it is less than 1200 s.ft., but is in a "really good area". An area known for stable turnover and considered one of the "best" in Mudville. So I refinanced to get out from under an adjustable rate mortgage with a bank that has since gone broke. I was very conservative in my choice of mortgage[30 yr fixed, 6.87%, strong lender] and I didn't "max out" my value, 'cause it made me nervous.

Fast forward to the present,where I am in Chapter 13, discharging several credit cards and the home equity LOC at $84K & 8% over the next 32 months. I was able to keep my home by going the Chapter 13 route. Without it, I would have lost my home to foreclosure and eventually been forced into bankruptcy anyway. I had hoped to be able to modify my 1st mortgage, but I no longer qualify as I am not dead, totally disabled or in foreclosure. This has left me in a very tight financial situation with no savings to fall back on and making each property tax payment an obstacle to overcome, so the notice I received in the mail last week was "good news".

My property values had been
listed as $240K for the last
couple of years.
The only problem was that
at least a year ago, the
"market value" was $120K...

and due to the inflated value,
my property taxes were
about $750, two times a year...
and due to the fact the the state,
county and city are BROKE....
the chances for tax relief by way
of reassessment, seemed dim...


So when I received a new assessment for $120 K in the mail, it was Christmas in July.
Of course, I don't know how this affects my tax bill yet, but it should be lower.
My concern now is if I have to call the police or firemen to come to my home that I can now better afford to keep, will anyone show up in a timely manner... ?

...no news is good news...really ?

One would think that any legal proceedings such as being accepted into Bankruptcy would rate at least a letter from the court acknowledging said state.

Apparently not...

When someone files for bankruptcy, they are required to go through 2 credit counseling sessions online, [not unlike traffic school...], paying a fee & earning "certificates".
[I will not discuss at length, the total lack of value of this kind of punitive busywork, especially at the point in the credit life of the debtor where bankruptcy is the only option, except to say that it reminded me of making misbehaving students write "sentences". Traffic School is actually a far better & more useful experience.]


The first course was done and filed before my paperwork could begin.

On April 4, before my case was filed, I was required to complete the second course & submit my certificate to the lawyers to be filed with my case. I arranged to have a copy of my certificate e-mailed to the lawyer and I called to confirm that they received it. On April 19, I received a request from the court to submit my credit counseling certificate [form 23]. Informing me that if they did not have it on file by my court date, [May 4], my case would be dropped and it would be expensive to re-instate.

I called the lawyer, who assured me that they had filed the certificate and that, "they always send out that form. Just ignore it"... so I did.

time passed...

The "meeting with creditors", aka court date [May 4] came & went. I sat at home waiting... for some notice that my case was accepted into bankruptcy. The 45 day period expired and the only notice I received was a receipt for my 1st payment to the Trustee. [By my court date, I had made 2. Today, I'm mailing #4 of 36. I am actually "ahead" since this payment isn't due until 7/25/11, but it takes about half of my Social Security check for each payment, which must be by money order. I've found an Smart store that has only a $.79 charge for an m.o. under $500 and in order to make sure that I can always get the payment in on time, I have to do it this way.]

But I digress...

On June 19, the court sent me another "form 23", with similar warnings as to the dire consequences for "non-compliance"...

Of course it was late on a Friday afternoon when I opened the letter, so I called the lawyer, explained the situation and received some surprising information.

"Oh, no news is good news from the court... they only contact you if there is a problem with your case... we filed your certificate... just fill-out the form 23 and send us a copy... we'll take care of it..."

Which I did...

On Monday, the lawyers left a voice mail. They had contacted the court and discovered that there was some sort of "glitch" with the computer and quite a few people had received "form 23" notices in error. The court had found the problem and had acknowledged the receipt of my certificates, so all was well...

HMMMMMMMMMMMMM....

It would have been really nice to have received a letter from the court, notifying me of the acceptance of my Chapter 13 petition. The sense of relief at the completion of a pretty stressful and terrifying few years would have been welcome.
As it is, I still feel like I'm waiting,  "for the other shoe to fall",  but I suppose that I just have to trust that the worst is behind me and move on.

The HUD counselor just called to "check-up" on my situation.We had put the mortgage modification on hold during the bankruptcy filing period. It seem that the banks are now making it much harder to modify based on "imminent default", which was my qualification. Now, to qualify, one of the mortgage holders has to die, suffer total disability or be months behind on their mortgage. Since I'm not dead, not totally disabled and current on my mortgage, I no longer qualify. This just means that things will remain very tight financially unless I get some sort of extra money each month. But, things have worked out so far... so I'll just continue to trust that God will provide all my needs.

...any day now

it's been a while since I was here... I have been sick on & off since early May and since I don't have internet access at home, it took too much effort to come down to the church while I was sick, just to blog.

Especially since I'm still waiting to hear from the Bankruptcy Court as to the final approval of my Chapter 13 plan. The 45 day period will expire soon as my Creditors meeting with the Trustee was May 4 and the judge is supposed to rule on my case within 45 days, which would be June 18. So I had been hoping to have some news to relay and though it hasn't happened yet, it should happen soon.

In the meantime, I have made my "payments "to the Trustee, which are due on the 25th of the month. I've made 3 so far... I'm trying to stay ahead so I've already mailed the payment due June 25. If the plan is accepted, my final payment will be March 25, 2014. During this time, I'm not allowed to enter into any credit obligations, as if anyone would give me credit anyway, but that's probably a good thing, as I've never done "well" managing credit as my current situation should attest.

As soon as the Chapter 13 is accepted, I'll try again to modify my mortgage. Being "in" bankruptcy may get their attention...

This late spring has been very stormy... quite a bit of unseasonal cool weather and rain... which in the garden, has its good side as well as its down side...

The Johnny Jump-ups, which would normally be toast by now, are flourishing.

In late April, these cherry toms were ripening, I've since eaten them & watched these just setting tomatoes grow and ripen as well.

Here the same plant is today... just covered with ripening fruit, yum...

and some of them are as big as golf balls !

Meanwhile, around in the back yard...

the Mr Stripys are still waiting for the sun...

the Brandywines are growing a bit...

but not like the Beefmaster and Pink Caspian, which were not from 6 packs & got a quicker start.

The Cherry toms in the back are growing...

this Sun Sweet is actually coloring up...

but the few others that are set are quite green...

The critters have left the crook neck squash alone so far and one has set there.

The Blue Lake pole beans are enjoying the cooler weather though...

and have even given my the first bean !

Unfortunately, I didn't get any cherries and the peach tree lost most of its crop to the weather.

But there are apples, "growing"...

and the pomegranate tree is exploding with blooms.

Ever the opportunist, the volunteer hollyhocks from the ranch, have "moved" themselves to a sunnier location and are blooming like crazy.

I'm sure that soon, summer will arrive and we'll be complaining about the heat. But as for me, I'm enjoying the cooler days as long as they last... even if it means that the garden grows slower...

...ALWAYS read the fine print

Sometimes, being "careful", [OK,OK... anal...] has its advantages.

If I hadn't compulsively forced myself to read all the pages of the Chapter 13 documents I recently signed, I wouldn't have found what might have been a costly error.

I had filled-out l-o-n-g financial disclosure forms for the lawyer and had a long meeting, discussing my answers, line by line. We discussed one problematic entry and I thought that we were "clear" that that monthly deposit by a "holding company" for the school district was merely a reimbursement for the monthly medical insurance premium taken by "the state"health insurance provider from my state teachers pension check, which the "district" will continue to pay, monthly, until I'm 65.
I received no W2,W4 or 1099, since it wasn't considered income, just a benefit agreed upon by the district and the teachers union years ago. I couldn't choose to receive a cash payment if I wanted to. They agreed to pay the "lowest" monthly premium for my medical insurance until I'm 65, period.

When we had a different insurance provider, they sent the check each month for me and all my colleagues under 65, directly to the provider. However, when we changed to the "CALPers" health insurance plan in November, 2009, things became, "complicated"...

Complicated, because my teachers pension is paid by CALSTRS, also a statewide organization. So CALPers insisted that all monthly medical premiums for their insurance paid by current retirees, be deducted from the CALSTRS benefit check,
before the monthly check was mailed or direct deposited. That didn't really bother me but school districts, like my former employer, now had to put aside the premiums they were paying for us into a holding company, which would reimburse us for the amount withheld by CALPers from my monthly CALSTRS pension payment, and the fun began...

Since these premiums were always paid directly to the insurance provider, there was no danger that they might be misunderstood as income. The IRS doesn't even require them to be reported. But apparently, the clerk, whose job it was to transfer all my financial info onto the Chapter 13 forms, had never seen anything like it before.
She reported my gross CALSTRS pension[including the amount deducted], as well as including the "reimbursement amount" each month, ballooning my "annualized income" from $25 K to over $32 K... so I called the lawyer's office.

It took some time for the lawyer on the phone, looking at my papers to understand the problem. I told her that I had had my 2010 taxes done, since we met, and could prove that I didn't make anywhere near $32 K... then she saw the problem. The reimbursement was reported as income, while listing the gross pension amount before taxes, deductions, etc... so they are doing an,"amended financial statement", which I will be going in to sign before my court date on May 4. At that time, any creditors can show up and complain about the settlement, but once the judge accepts the settlement amount, it stays for the 36 months as long as I pay the amount on time each month. At the end of 36 months, all the debt is expunged, although my credit rating will be bad for another 5 years. If I hadn't caught this mistake now, the case might have been contested for a larger settlement, which I can't afford, or the papers might have had to be refiled, which is expensive.

It has been a long, strange & frightening trip... and it's not over yet. I'm SOOO not looking forward to the court date. If creditors show up, it will be unpleasant, to say the least, but I'm told that often, no creditors show and the judge accepts the case into Chapter 13 with no real drama. I could use a little less drama.

More news as it becomes available.